


To Not Know Who I Am (But to Know That I'm Good Long as You're Here With Me)

by sweeterthankarma



Category: Captain Marvel (2019), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/F, Feelings, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2020-05-20 07:51:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19372411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweeterthankarma/pseuds/sweeterthankarma
Summary: “You know me better than anyone,” Carol says, almost like an announcement when they’re both settled and surrounded by the night. Carol’s words aren’t a question, aren’t a confession, aren’t an accusation or really anything at all. They’re just the truth.





	To Not Know Who I Am (But to Know That I'm Good Long as You're Here With Me)

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from the song "I Like Me Better" by Lauv.

It’s a dark night, illuminated only by the distant crescent moon in the sky that’s perpetually shrouded by clouds. Carol sits in Maria’s porch swing, the one that’s always been saved for guest s— for her one day, Maria had always hoped, and it’s like Carol knows this. Maria sits in the deck chair beside her, the one that’s usually reserved for Monica, because she wants to be closer to her, no,  _ needs  _ to be closer to her. It’d be strange and off putting for her to keep that much space between them anyways, no matter how long they’ve been apart and how much things have changed. Besides, when she walks over Carol gives her those eyes and that soft, inquisitive lift of lips that was once as familiar to her as breathing, and with that, it would have been impossible for Maria to continue to exist any further away from her than she already was (only maybe five or six feet.) 

     “You know me better than anyone,” Carol says, almost like an announcement when they’re both settled and surrounded by the night. It’s peace and quiet all around, aside from the rhythmic chirping of cicadas and the faint engine of a car passing on the street beyond the yard. 

Carol’s words aren’t a question, aren’t a confession, aren’t an accusation or really anything at all. They’re just the truth.

There’s a pause, and Maria nods, barely perceptible, though of course Carol sees it. 

     “Better than anyone has ever known me,” she continues, and Maria can’t object — why would she, anyway? Carol’s words are veracious for her too, and she thinks they both know it, even if Carol remembers little to nothing about her past, about  _ their  _ past.

     “Better than anyone ever will.”

There’s a quiet fire in Carol’s words, in her eyes, in her presence. It’s like she’s having a revelation, and maybe she is. There’s weight in every word that has left her mouth, and there usually is, but this time it’s something personal, something deep, something heavy and immovable and a bit daunting but  _ real.  _ It’s a little hard to put into words and a lot to process and it’s certainly implicative, but Carol can’t doubt it and it’s clear she isn’t trying to. 

Maria isn’t either. 

She watches Carol as she muses. She doesn’t bite her lip or fidget her fingers or shift in her seat or do anything at all, really. She just thinks, ponders, maybe questions unknown theories about her life to whatever gods or leaders above, Maria doesn’t know. 

But then Carol meets her eyes again, for the first time in maybe thirty or forty five seconds though if Maria is honest, it already feels like a lifetime. She smiles again, just slight enough to be coy but bright enough to be sure, and Maria smiles back. 

It feels a lot like a mutual understanding, like an unspoken promise, like a new beginning. When they finally move to stand up and head inside, closing the sliding door and locking the deadbolt behind it, Maria can’t help but notice that all of the clouds have since vacated from the sky, leaving the moon shining clear and bold and nearly close enough to touch, just like Carol. 

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed, please let me know and free to swing by my Tumblr under the same username, sweeterthankarma, and talk to me about how subtly and beautifully in love these two are.


End file.
